The Chimp Paradox

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The Human and Chimp have independent personalities with different agendas, ways of thinking and modes of operating. Effectively, there are two beings in your head! It is important to grasp that only one of these beings is you, the Human. The Chimp is the emotional machine that we all possess. It thinks independently from us and can make decisions. It offers emotional thoughts and feelings that can be very constructive or very destructive; it is not good or bad, it is a Chimp. The Chimp Paradox is that it can be your best friend and your worst enemy, even at the same time.

If you think calmly and rationally then we can see the blood going to the frontal area, the Human in your head, and you become the person that you want to be and that you really are. If you become emotional and somewhat irrational, especially when you are angry or distressed, then we see the blood supply go to your Chimp, and you would usually say this is not how you want to be and that you don’t want this.

You are not responsible for the nature of your Chimp but you are responsible for managing it.

The Computer stores information that the Chimp or Human has put into it. It then uses this information to act for them in an automatic way or it can serve as a reference point.

This is why it's important to continuously build reference experiences. Make it the most important aspect of your life - October 12, 2023 @ 7:52 AM

To understand how you and your Chimp work differently, we will approach this in a systematic way by looking at four aspects: 
Ways of thinking 
Agendas 
Modes of operating 
Personalities

Ways of thinking

You and your Chimp think in very different ways. As we go about our day we are continually receiving information from around us. The Human and Chimp both receive this information and then interpret it. 
The Chimp interprets this information with feelings and impressions. When it has gotten a feel for what is going on, it then uses emotional thinking to put things together and to work out what is happening and form a plan of action. All of this process is based on emotion. Emotional thinking means that the Chimp makes guesses and fills in detail by assumptions that are typically based on a hunch, paranoid feelings or defensive thoughts. The chances therefore that the Chimp will get the right interpretation as to what is happening may not be so good; however, sometimes the gut feeling it has is right. It can only think and act with emotion. 
The Human, on the other hand, will interpret information by searching for the facts and establishing the truth. When it has done this, it will then put things together in a logical manner using logical thinking and form a plan of action based on this. So logic is the Human’s basis for thinking and acting.

Both processes can be healthy, but lead to different interpretations of what is happening and how to deal with it.

Sometimes the two of you agree on what to do and there is no problem, but often the two of you disagree. When you disagree, the Chimp is the most powerful and therefore gets control of your thoughts and actions. However, if you recognize what is happening, and have strategies for managing this, you will gain control of your thinking and then you can act in a logical manner.

Emotional Thinking of the Chimp
Jumps to an opinion 
Thinks in black and white 
Paranoid 
Catastrophic 
Irrational 
Emotive judgment 
Impulsive
Irrationally Optimistic

Logical Thinking of the Human  
Evidence-based 
Rational 
In context and with perspective 
Shades of gray and balanced judgment

Agendas

Agenda of the Chimp
Perpetuation of the species and self-survival (Survive and replicate)
Seek Pleasure
Avoid Pain
Protect position in social hierarchy

Agendas of the Human
Self-agenda. 
Society Agenda

Modes of operating for

Chimp Operating
Instincts - Fight, Flight, Freeze
Drives - Food, Power, Sex, Ego, Territory, Social, Curiosity, Security
Vulnerable Stance
Male and Female dynamics - Testosterone

Human Operating
Honesty
Compassion
Conscience
Self-Control
Sense of Purpose
Achievement and Satisfaction

How to Manage your Chimp

Recognize who is in charge: the Human or the Chimp.

The first step is to be able to recognize who is in control, the Chimp or the Human. You can ask a very simple question that will give you an easy way of recognizing who is in charge.

The golden rule is that whenever have you feelings, thoughts or behaviors that you do not want or welcome, then you are being hijacked by your Chimp.

The very simple question therefore is to begin with “Do I want…” and then finish the sentence. For example: “Do I want these feelings?” or “Do I want these thoughts?” or “Do I want to be behaving this way?” If the answer is “no” then you are in Chimp mode and if the answer is “yes” then you are in Human mode.

Very helpful distinction October 09, 2023 @ 7:25 AM

"I feel" / "I don't feel" is another way to identify if the Chimp or Human is operating
"I want to / I don't want to"
"it's not fair"
"why do I have to"
"I don't care"
"that's stupid"
"I'll do it later"
"It's hard/too hard"
"I'm tired"
"That's not my job"

Think of a whiny kid/teenager. If you're reasoning sounds like something a whiny kid would say, then it's probably your chimp in control.

Remember that Chimps like to go on how they feel to decide on future actions, whereas Humans tend to go on what needs to be done and also how they will feel at the end of the day when they look back on how they used their time. These are two very different approaches.

Understand the rules of how the brain works and ACCEPT these.

All information goes to the Chimp first

It is the norm for most of us to run on emotion throughout our day and there is nothing wrong with this. Problems arise when the Chimp gives us a suggestion that is not appropriate and we then allow it to control us and don’t know how to stop the Chimp from dominating us.

(Why we can't take the power off the Chimp and make decisions?) The simple answer is that the Chimp is more powerful and acts more quickly than the Human.

It is no use trying to control a Chimp with willpower. I call this “arm-wrestling the Chimp.” We all learn at about the age of three that willpower is not a very good way to do most things. It only works when the Chimp is asleep, indifferent or agrees. When the Chimp has a different agenda then willpower goes out of the window. So we must learn different ways to deal with the Chimp.

The basic way that your emotions work is that the Chimp interprets what is happening and then offers the Human an emotion and a suggestion of how to deal with the situation. The Human then makes the decision on whether to accept the Chimp’s offer or reject it.

This idea sounds like Meditation where you are offered thoughts/emotions and you can choose to accept them or let them exist and pass of (reject them)

Part of the problem is that most people don’t realize that the Chimp is merely making an offer and not a command. You do not have to follow your emotions; you have a choice.

Nurture and manage your Chimp to get the best results for you.

The Chimp’s drives won’t change but its behaviors can

A crucial step in Mind Management is accepting that your Chimp’s fundamental drives do not change. You can’t change the nature of the Chimp that you are working with. It is an emotional machine that is never going to be programmed differently. Your Chimp will always act on drives and according to its nature, with emotions and actions such as aggression, neurosis or impulsivity.

There are two aspects to working with the Chimp: nurturing the Chimp and managing the Chimp, and they have to be addressed in that order.

This is a really important point, so please think carefully about it. If you have a Chimp that is well looked after by being nurtured and having all its needs met, then it is very likely that this happy little animal will not cause you any trouble. This makes managing it very easy. If you do not look after your Chimp then it is very likely that it will rebel at any time and cause you a lot of pain. Nurturing and managing the Chimp is an emotional skill, and will take time and commitment to develop and maintain it.

This is an interesting idea. It's like with a dog. You can train it to not bite furniture (manage) but you can also give it a bone to allow it to let out the urge/drive to chew on things (nurture) - October 09, 2023 @ 8:02 AM

The main drives and needs of the Chimp are unique to your Chimp but for most Chimps these are a combination of power, territory, ego, dominance, sex, food, troop, security, inquisitiveness and parental drives.

Sex
Food
Inquisitiveness
Power
Troop
Energy Management

Three Ways to manage your Chimp
Exercise 
Box 
Banana

Exercise

If your Chimp is agitated or upset about something, the first thing it has to do is to release this emotion or opinion. This is called “Exercising the Chimp.” You must allow it to do this if it is to listen. Allowing the Chimp to express emotion will calm it down, and then the Chimp will be able to listen to reason or just go to sleep. Expressing emotion means saying exactly what you think, no matter how irrational it may be, and doing this for as long as it takes. Remember that the Chimp is irrational, so just let it express its feelings and then when it has finished let the Human select the sensible things that have been said and ignore the nonsense. Most Chimps will take less than ten minutes to express fears or emotions and then will go silent and listen. Occasionally they may need a second exercise. If you were going to exercise a real chimpanzee you would take it to a fenced compound and let it loose. You wouldn’t take it to your local supermarket and let it off the chain! Don’t exercise your Chimp in the supermarket!

Box

Once the Chimp has finished exercising, you then have a chance to deal with it in a more measured way. If we assume the Chimp has exercised enough and is now in a place to receive information, we can address its fears and concerns by speaking to it. Using facts, truth and logic we can continue to calm the Chimp down and reason with it. This reasoning by the Human is called “Boxing the Chimp.”

Boxing the Chimp is therefore telling it truths that it will accept in order to calm it down.

Banana

A third way to manage the Chimp is to feed it bananas. These are things the Chimp wants that are given either as a distraction or a reward. So there are two types of bananas: distractions and rewards. Feeding the Chimp bananas is not a very powerful way to solve problems, but in some circumstances they can be a very effective way to manage the Chimp.

Blocking the Chimp from thinking can be used in a lot of different scenarios with good effect.

The Computer in your mind

Your Computer has two functions: 
It can think and act automatically for you using programmed thoughts and behaviors. 
It is a reference source for information, beliefs and values.

What if we completely externalize this computer. Turn it inside out. We work backwards from our values, map our desired beliefs and logged experiences that match them to build a large log of the times where we acted congruent/incongruent with our values, beliefs.

Four Elements of the Computer
The Autopilot is a helpful for constructive belief or behavior. 
The Gremlin is an unhelpful or destructive belief or behavior that is removable. 
The Goblin is an unhelpful or destructive belief or behavior that is firmly fixed and extremely difficult to remove. 
The Stone of Life contains the values and beliefs by which you live your life.

Computer functions in detail
Automatic functioning 
Acting as a reference source

Automatic functioning, which is exactly what it sounds like, is based on learned behaviors, learned beliefs and automatic programs. It is when we just act with behaviors or thoughts that we have already worked out and can almost carry them out in our sleep. There is little effort on our part as a Human to think. When we combine actions, we can form complicated programs, such as making a cup of coffee or riding a bike, which we eventually do automatically without thinking.

The Computer does most of the work in taking us through our day. How well it gets us through the day will depend on what has been put into it. We can of course add and remove things from the Computer, if we stop and take time to maintain it. The problem is that most of us do not do this.

Both the Human and the Chimp use the Computer as a memory bank for decision making. When any experience occurs, the Human and the Chimp interpret what’s happening and then look into the Computer to see the previous experiences, beliefs or memories that are stored. A decision or course of action can be influenced by this stored information.

The Truths of Life are how you believe the world works and you can “prove” they are true by examples and experience. You have either worked them out or accepted them from somewhere (parents, education, experience and so on).

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